簡單的英語閱讀帶譯文

Ⅰ 英語小短文帶翻譯，10字左右，簡單的，小學四年級的水平

This is my room .Look,there's a new bed in my room. On the bed ,there'a toy dog、there's a picturbag On the wall.oh,my computer、my book and my telephone in my desk,I very like my room !
這是莪的房間，看，這兒有一張新床，床上是一隻玩具狗，牆專上有一個照片包。屬哦，莪的電腦，莪的書本以及莪的電話都在莪的桌上，莪很喜歡莪的房間。

希望滿意

Ⅱ 十篇英語短文 帶翻譯

my family
i love my family, because i have a happy family.
my father is an english teacher. his name is jacky. he is thirty-eight. he likes playing basketball. what』s my mother job? is she a teacher? yes, you』re right! my mother is very kind and nice, she is thirty-seven. my mother is always laborious work. i love my parents!
on saturday and sunday, i often go to the library and play the piano, my father go to play basketball. sometimes, we watch tv and listen to music at home.
i love my family. because i』m very happy to live with my parents together!
我的家庭
我愛我的家庭,因為我有一個快樂的家庭.
我的爸爸是一名英語教師,他的名字叫jacky.他今年38歲.他非常喜歡打籃球.我的媽媽是趕什麼呢?她是一名教師嗎?是的.你說對了!我的媽媽是一個很親切、友善的人,她今年37歲.我媽媽總是勤勞的幹活.我愛我的父母.
在星期六和星期天里,我經常去圖書館和彈鋼琴.我爸爸去打籃球.有時侯,我們都在家看電視和聽音樂.
我愛我家.因為我和爸爸媽媽一起生活得很開心!
lan and fred
lan and fred were boys. they were both twelve years old, and they were in the same class in their school. last friday afternoon they had a fight in class, and their teacher was very angry. he said to both of them, 「stay here after the lessons this afternoon, and write your names a thousand times.」 after the last lesson, all the other boys went home, but lan and fred stayed in the classroom with their teacher and begin writing their names.
then fred began crying.
the teacher looked at him and said,」 why are you crying, fred?」
「because his name』s lan may, and mine』s frederick hollingsworth,」 fred said.
易恩和富雷得
易恩和富雷得都是男孩，他們都十二歲了。他們在學校里是同班同學。上周五下午他們在學校里打了一架。為此老師很生氣。老師對他們說：「下午下課後留在著把你們的名字寫一千遍。」
最後一節課下課，所有的學生都回家了。只有易恩和富雷得被他們的老師留在教師里抄寫他們的名字。
接著富雷得哭了起來。
老師看了看他問：「富雷得，你為什麼要哭呢？」
「因為他的名字是lan may, 而我的名字確是frederick hollingsworth，」富雷得回答道。
ann』s diary
today was sunday. today was september 30th, 2004. it was a boring day. it was hot. i was not a work.
i watched tv all morning. the shows were boring. then i called my friend, nancy. she wasn』t at home. i didn』t know where she was.
at twelve i was hungry. there was not any food in the fridge. i was lazy. i was tired. then i ate lunch outside. at one o』clock. i was in bed. in the afternoon i was at the movies. the film was boring. i『m glad tomorrow is monday. i can go to school and see my friends.
安的日記
今天是星期天，2004年9月30日。這是令人厭煩的一天。今天天氣很熱，我呆在家裡，不用去上學。
我看了一上午的電視。電視節目和無聊。於是我給好朋友南西打電話，可她不在家。我不知道她去哪裡了。
十二點我餓了，可是冰箱里什麼食物都沒有。我很懶惰，也很勞累，於是我出去吃了午飯。一點我上床睡覺。下午我去了電影院。電影很無聊。很高興明天就是星期一了，我有可以返回學校見到我的好朋友了。
notice
to all the teachers and students in grade 7,
this afternoon, all the students in grade 7 will go to the west hill to plant trees. we『ll take a bus there, and make sure to gather at the school gate at 2pm. don『t be late.
the school office
march 18th, 2006
告示
今天下午七年級全體同學要乘車去西山(west hill)植樹(plant trees).請2:00准時在校門口集合
或者
watermelon is many people『s favorite. it is sweet and it has a lot of water. watermelon has two colors, green outside and red inside. people usually have watermelons in summer. but nowadays we can eat watermelon every season in the year.
西瓜
西瓜是很多人喜歡的食物。它很甜而且水量多。西瓜的顏色，外面是綠的裡面是紅的。人們以往通常在夏天才吃西瓜，但現在一年的每個季節我們都可以吃到西瓜了。
inside the russian embassy in london a kgb colonel puffed a cigarette as he read the handwritten note for the third time. there was no need for the writer to express regret, he though. correcting this problem would be easy. he would do that in a moment. the thought of it caused a grim smile to appear and joy to his heart. but he pushed away those thoughts and turned his attention to a framed photograph on his desk. his wife was beautiful, he told himself as he remembered the day they were married. that was forty-three years ago, and it had been the proudest and happiest day of his life.
在倫敦的俄國使館，一位克格勃上校一邊吞雲吐霧，一邊讀著一張手寫的字條，這已是他第三次在讀這張字條了。便條的作者不必表示遺憾了，上校這樣想著。糾正這個錯誤其實很容易。他只要一會兒工夫便會做到。想到

Ⅲ 10篇英語經典短文帶翻譯（越短越好）

又要經典又要帶翻譯還要10篇，還不給分，你好貪心喲！
《別讓蠟燭熄滅》
A man had a little daughter—an only and much-loved child. He lived for her—she was his life. So when she became ill, he became like a man possessed, moving heaven and earth to bring about her restoration to health。
一個男人有一個很小的女兒，那是他唯一的孩子，他深深地愛著她，為她而活，她就是他的生命。所以，當女兒生病時，他像瘋了一般竭盡全力想讓她恢復健康。

His best efforts, however, proved unavailing and the child died. The father became a bitter recluse, shutting himself away from his many friends and refusing every activity that might restore his poise and bring him back to his normal self. But one night he had a dream。
然而，他所有的努力都無濟於事，女兒還是死了。父親變得痛苦遁世，避開了許多朋友，拒絕參加一切能使他恢復平靜，回到自我的活動。但有一天夜裡，他做了一個夢。

He was in heaven, witnessing a grand pageant of all the little child angels. They were marching in a line passing by the Great White Throne. Every white-robed angelic child carried a candle. He noticed that one child's candle was not lighted. Then he saw that the child with the dark candle was his own little girl. Rushing to her, he seized her in his arms, caressed her tenderly, and then asked, "How is it, darling, that your candle alone is unlighted?" "Daddy, they often relight it, but your tears always put it out."
他到了天堂，看到所有的小天使都身穿白色天使衣，手裡拿著一根蠟燭。他注意到有一個小天使的蠟燭沒有點亮。隨後，他看到那個拿著沒有點亮的蠟燭的小天使是自己的女兒。他奔過去，一把將女兒抱在懷里，溫柔地抱著她，然後問道：「寶貝兒，為什麼只有你的蠟燭沒有點亮呢？」「爸爸，他們經常重新點亮蠟燭，可是你的眼淚總是把它熄滅。」

Just then he awoke from his dream. The lesson was crystal clear, and its effects were immediate. From that hour on he was not a recluse, but mingled freely and cheerfully with his former friends and associates. No longer would his darling's candle be extinguished by his useless tears。
就在這時，他從夢中醒來。夢給他上的一課很明顯，而且立竿見影。從那個時候起，他不再消極遁世，而是自由自在，興高采烈的回到從前的朋友和同事們中間。寶貝女兒的蠟燭再也沒有被他無用的眼淚熄滅過。

Ⅳ 英語短文帶翻譯10篇。

Park
There is a park near my home.There are a lot of beautiful trees,flowers and birds in the park.So many people go to the park to enjoy their weekends.They like walking or having a picnic in the park.But I like flying a kite with my sisiter there. 我家附近有一個公園。哪裡有很多美麗的樹、花和小鳥。所以很多人都喜歡到那裡去度周末。他們喜歡在公園里散步或是野餐.但是我喜歡和我姐姐在那裡放風箏。
Bedroom
I have a small bedroom.There are only a small bed,a small desk and a small chair in the room.And there is a beautiful doll on my blue bed.Everyday I do my homework,read books and play games with the doll in my bedroom.It is small,but it gives me much happiness. 我有一間小小的卧室。那裡有一張小小的床、小小桌子和一把小小的椅子。而且還有一個漂亮的娃娃在我那張藍色的小床上。我每天都在房間里寫作業，看書和與我的娃娃玩。雖然房間很小，但是他給了我很多歡樂。
My father
My father is a tall and handsome man.He is a policeman. Everyday he comes back home very late,because he must help the others.He doesn't have time to examine my homework and take me to the park.But I like my father,because he is a good policeman. 我的爸爸是一個高大帥氣的男人。他是一個警察。他每天都很晚才回家，因為他要幫助其他的人。他沒有時間給我檢查作業和帶我去公園。但是我仍然很喜歡我的爸爸，因為他是一個好警察。
I am from ShenZhen. In spring ,the weather is warm and wet. I can play kite. In summer, the weather is hot and wet. I can swim in the swimming pool. In the autumn, the weather is cool and dry. I can play kite, too. In the winter, the weather is cold and dry. It never snow.
我是來自深圳。在春天，在天氣溫暖及潮濕。我可以玩風箏。在夏季，天氣炎熱及潮濕。我可以游泳，在游泳池。在秋天，天氣涼爽，乾燥。我可以玩風箏，太。在冬季，天氣寒冷及乾燥。它從來沒有積雪。
Today is my grandpa's birthday. Our family went back to my grandpa's home in the morning. We got together to have a big family dinner to celebrate his birthady. We bought a big birthday cake and gave some presents to my grandpa.
In the afternoon, we went to the park to go boating. We had a good time. My grandpa had a nice time on his birthday.
今天是爺爺的生日，我們全家早晨回到爺爺家。我們舉行了大型家庭聚會來慶祝爺爺的生日。我們買了一個大生日蛋糕，並且送給爺爺一些禮物。
下午我們去公園劃船。我們玩得很開心，爺爺過了一個愉快的生日
Mr.Knott is a teacher. He is at home. The telephone rings. He answers the phone.He says,「Hello.This is 82654379. Who's that?」「Watt」 a man answers.「watt's your name,please?」says Mr.Knott is angry.「Watt's my name!」the other man is angey,too.
knott先生是一名教師。他是在家中。電話響了。他回答接起電話，說，「 你好，這是82654379 。你是誰？ 」「瓦特」一個男人答道 。「請問你的名字是什麼？ 」knott先生生氣地說。「瓦特就是我的名字！」另一名男子是也生氣了。
A farmer has five sons.They are Ted,Bob,Tom,John and Bill. John has no elder brother. He was four years older when his first younger brother was born. The number of Tom『s elder brothers is equal to his younger brothers. Bill will be twenty-one years old next year, and he is five years older than Bob. Bob is two years younger than Tom. Ted was sad because he has no younger brother. There are twelve years between him and John.
一個農民有5個兒子。他們是Ted,Bob,Tom,John 和 Bill。John沒有比他大的哥哥，他比第一個出生的比他小的那個弟弟大4歲，Tom哥哥的數量和他的弟弟的數量是一樣的（就是他是老三）Bill 明年就21歲了，他比Bob大5歲，比Tom小2歲，Ted因為沒有弟弟而難過 Ted 和John之間差了12歲
Everything in this world has a nature of its own. Some are charming, some are secing, like the candy, chocolate, the cakes, and some burn everything like fire, as soon as you get near.
天地萬物各有其本質，有些東西很有吸引力、很誘人，像糖果、巧克力、蛋糕等；有些則像火一樣，任何東西一靠近就會被它燒掉。
On My Way to School
Today I got up very early in the morning. After I finished breakfast, I went to school. On my way to school I saw something lying on the ground. I picked it up and found it was a mobile phone. I was afraid I would be late for school. I had no time to wait for the owner. So I gave it to the policeman.
Shortly after I reached my school, the headmaster came to my class and praised me in front of the class. How could he knew all about it? I guess it must be the policeman who told him what I did.
I am very happy that I have done a good job.
就我在上學的路上
今天，我得到了很早就在上午。當我完成早餐，我去了學校。就我在上學的路上我看到的東西躺在地上。我挑選它，並發現這是一部手提電話。我恐怕我會遲到的學校。我沒有時間去等待的所有者。因此，我給它的警察。
不久後，我達到了我的學校，校長來到我的班級，並贊揚我在前面的階級。他怎麼會知道的所有關於它呢？我猜想，它必須是警察誰告訴他，我所做的。
我很高興我已經做得不錯。
China has been a powerful country for the most part of the past three thousand years. China is now rising again. Why is that so surprising to people? History is the best evidence. The rise of China is just a matter of when, not if. Plus, do you want $100 jeans? Do you want $200 shoes? Do you want $3000 computers? If the answers are NO, you\'d better thank China and appreciate the benefits that it brings to your daily life.
中國在過去3000年歷史中大部分時間當中都是個強大的國家。中國現在再次崛起，為什麼人們會感到如此奇怪？歷史是最好的證明。中國崛起只是個時間問題，而不是是否能崛起的問題。另外，你希望賣100美元一條的牛仔褲，200美元一雙鞋，3000美元的電腦嗎？如果不願意，你必須要感謝中國，感謝中國為你日常生活做出的貢獻。

Ⅳ 10篇英語小短文帶翻譯

10篇英語小短文帶翻譯，稍微網路一番就有很多的範文出現。但是這些范專文中，寫的對不對好不好也無所得屬知。

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Ⅵ 英語閱讀帶翻譯，20篇哦

英語報紙上，練習冊上，很多的找找就有了

Ⅶ 一篇簡短得英語短文，帶翻譯

不知道你需要哪個方面的？
I enjoy reading very much
I enjoy reading very much.I am so absorbed in a good book that for the time being I forget my surrounding and even myself.I think reading can offer me certain pleasures that real life cannot do.In the first place.In the pages of books I can talk and walk with the wise and the good of all lands and all times.The people I meet in books are always ready to give me friendship that my friends in reality cannot give me .Furthermore,reading can add fullness to my life.By reading I can travel around the whole world.It can be said those who cannot enjoy reading are poor men; those who enjoy reading most can obtain the greatest pleasure from it.
我喜歡讀書
我喜歡讀書,我經常被一本好書吸引而忘記了周圍的事物.我想讀書能給我帶來在現實中不可能來的樂趣.首先,在書本中我能與智者交談,能在美妙的地域和時空中穿梭.在書本中我讀到的人都像是我的朋友,而這在現實世界中是不可能的.其次,讀書豐富了我的生活.通過閱讀我能暢游全世界.人們常說不會讀書的人是可憐的；而大多數讀書的人能從中獲得極大的樂趣
我非常喜歡讀書

Ⅷ 英語趣味小短文（帶翻譯）

1、Cat and Mice 貓和老鼠

Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a small boxwith holes punched in the top.

"What's in your box?" asked the friend.

"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've beendreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catchthem."

"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.

"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.

布朗夫人去拜訪一位朋友，她拿著一個頂部扎滿了小眼兒的盒子。「盒子里裝的是什麼？」朋友問道。「一隻小貓，」布朗夫人回答說，「你知道我晚上睡覺總夢見老鼠，我非常害怕。這只貓可以抓住那些老鼠。」「可老鼠都是假想的呀。」朋友說。「小貓也是假想的。」布朗夫人小聲說道。

2、I think that I'm a chicken 我是一隻雞

Psychiatrist: What's your problem?

Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?

Patient: Ever since I was an egg!

精神病醫師：你哪裡不舒服？

病人：我認為我是一隻雞。

精神病醫師：這種情況從什麼時候開始的？

病人：從我還是一隻蛋的時候開始的。

3、I Am Acting Like a Lady 我要表現得像位女士

One day when women's dresses were on sale at the FarEast DepartmentStore, a dignified middle-aged man decided to get his wife a piece. But he soonfound himself being battered by frantic women.

He stood it as long as he could; then, with head lowered and armsflailing, he plowed through the crowed.

"You there!" challenged a thrill voice. "Can't youact like a gentleman?"

"Listen," he said, "I have been acting like agentleman for an hour. From now on, I am acting like a lady."

一天，遠東百貨公司的女裝大減價，一位高貴的中年男士想給太太買一件。可是，沒過多久，他發現自己已被瘋狂的女人沖得踉踉蹌蹌。

他竭力忍耐著。後來，他低下頭，揮動雙臂，擠過人群。

「你幹嘛？」有人尖聲叫道，「你難道不能表現得像位紳士嗎？」

「聽著，」他說，「我過去一小時一直表現得像一位紳士。從現在起，我要表現得像位女士。」

4、The Broom Seller and the Barber 賣掃帚的人和理發師

A man who sold brooms went into a barber's shop to get shaved. Thebarber bought one of his brooms, and, when he had shaved him, asked for theprice of it.

"Two pence," said the man.

"No, no," said the barber, "I will give you a penny,and if you do not think that enough, you may take your broom again."

The man took it, and asked what he had to pay for his shave.

"A penny." said the barber.

"I will give you a half-penny, and if that is not enough, youmay put my beard on again."

一個賣掃帚的人去一家理發店修面。理發師向他買了一把掃帚。當理發師給他修完面後，問了一下掃帚的價錢。

賣掃帚的人說：「兩便士。」

「不，不。」理發師說，「我只出一便士。如果你認為不夠的話，可以把掃帚拿回去。」

賣掃帚的人取回了掃帚，隨後問修面要付多少錢。

賣掃帚的人說：「我只能給你半個便士，如果你認為不夠的話，你可以把鬍子再替我裝上。」

5、Want a Day Off 想請一天假

Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office."Boss," he says, "We're doing some heavy house-cleaning at hometomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, movingand hauling stuff." "We're short-handed, Smith," the bossreplies. "I can't give you the day off." "Thanks, boss,"says Smith, "I knew I could count on you!"

一天，史密斯去見他的客戶部領導。「老闆，」斯密斯說，「我們家明天要大搞清潔，我老婆需要我回去幫忙清潔閣樓和車庫，搬搬挪挪什麼的。」「斯密斯啊，你也知道，我們現在人手已經不夠了。」老闆說，「明天的假我是沒法給你批了」。「多謝老闆，」史密斯說，「我果然沒信錯人。」

6、I Lost 我輸了

It was at a five o』clock tea. A young man came tothe hostess to apologize for his lateness.

「So good of you to come, Mr. Jones, and where isyour brother?」

「You see we're very busy in the office and only oneof us could come, so we tossed up for it.」

「How nice! And so original, too! And you won?」

「No,」 said the young man absently, 「I lost.」

五點鍾，下午茶的時間，一個年輕人因為遲到向女主人致歉。

「您能來可真好，瓊斯先生，您的兄弟在哪兒呢？」

「您知道我們公司很忙，我們倆只能來一個，所以就擲幣來決定由誰來。」

「太有意思了！還那麼有創意！那您贏了？」

「不，」年輕人心不在焉地說，「我輸了。」

7、The Old Cat 老貓

An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old.One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.

Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years,and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old,but remember what good work the old did when they were young."

一位老婦有隻貓，這只貓很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了東西，因為它年紀太大了。一天，老貓發現一隻老鼠，它跳過去抓這只老鼠，然而，它咬不住這只老鼠。因此，老鼠從它的嘴邊溜掉了，因為老貓咬不了它。於是，老婦很生氣，因為老貓沒有把老鼠咬死。她開始打這只貓，貓說：「不要打你的老僕人，我已經為你服務了很多年，而且還願意為你效勞，但是，我實在太老了，對年紀大的不要這么無情，要記住老年人在年青時所做過的有益的事情。

8、There Good Friends 三個好朋友

One day, a monkey rides his bike near the river. This time he sees a lion under a tree. The lion runs at him. He is afraid and falls into the river. He can』t swim. He shouts. The rabbit hears him. He jumps into the river. The rabbit swims to the monkey, but he can』t help him. Luckily, an elephant comes along. He is very strong. He helps the rabbit and monkey. Three friends are very happy. They go to the elephant』s home. Then, three of them become good friends。

一天，一隻猴子在河邊騎車。這時他看見樹下有一隻獅子，獅子向他跑來。他非常的害怕，掉進河裡。他不會游泳，大叫起來。兔子聽見了，跳進水裡，但他卻沒有辦法救猴子。幸運的是，一隻大象過來了。大象非常強壯，救出了兔子和猴子。他們來到大象的家，在那裡吃了一頓大餐。從此他們成了好朋友。

Ⅸ 要英語小短文，帶翻譯的，簡單一點點，謝謝了！

英文幽默故事：
There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000. The customer asked the owner, 「How come this guy is $5,000? That』s so expensive for this kindof parrot.」 The owner said, 「Because I have trained him and he can talk.」 So the customer asked him, 「How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?」 The owner said, 「Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That』s why he』s so expensive.」 Then the customer said, 「How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?」 The owner of the shopsaid, 「I don』t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call him 『The Boss.』」
老闆最大 有個人到一間商店買鸚鵡。店裡有三隻鸚鵡，其中一隻賣五千元，另一隻賣一萬元，還有一隻賣三萬元。顧客問老闆：「為什麼這只要賣五千元？這個價錢對這種鸚鵡來說太貴了！」老闆說：「因為我有訓練他講話。」顧客又問：「那這只呢？他會做什麼？為什麼要賣這么貴？」老闆說：「他除了會說話之外，還會表演一些有趣的動作，好比說跳舞等等，所以才賣這么貴。」顧客接著又問：「那第三隻呢？他會做什麼？為什麼要賣這么貴？」老闆說：「我不知道。我從沒聽過他講話、吹口哨或唱歌，也沒看過他跳舞，什麼都沒有！不過另外兩只叫他：『老闆！』」

Where is the egg?
Teacher:Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?
Student:Yes.I ate a piece of cake yesterday.
Teacher:Then where is the 「egg"?
Student:In the cake,Sir.
雞蛋在哪裡？
老師：你能用「雞蛋」一詞造句嗎？
學生：可以。我昨天吃了一塊蛋糕。
老師：「雞蛋」在哪？
學生：在蛋糕里，先生

Tom is a little boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes to a cinema. It is the first time for him to do that. He buys a ticket and goes in. But after two or three minutes he comes out, and buys the second ticket and goes in again. After a few minutes he comes out again and buys the third ticket. Two or three minutes after that he comes out and asks for another ticket. But a girl asks him,「Why do you buy so many tickets? How many friends do you meet?」 「No, I have no friends here, but a big woman always stops me at the door and cuts up my ticket.」
湯姆是個小孩， 他才7歲。 當他去電影院的時候。那時他第一次去。他買了張票進去了。 但沒過兩三分鍾他就出來了，然後買了第二張票又進去了。 幾分鍾後他又出來買了第三張票。 接著兩三分鍾後他又出來買票。 一個女的問她，「你為什麼要買那麼多票啊? 你見到了幾個朋友？" "沒有， 我裡面沒朋友， 但是每當我進門的時候一位大的女人老把我的票給剪了"

Child:My uncle has 1000 men under him.
Man:He is really somebody.What does do?
Child:A maintenance man in a cemetery
他真是一個大人物
小孩：我叔叔下面有1000個人。
男人：他真是一個大人物。他是干什麼的？
小孩：墓地守墓人。

Teacher: Would Shakespeare be a great man if he were still alive today?
Student: Of course. He must be a great man, for so far nobody has lived to over 400 years.
一名偉人
老師：如果莎士比亞還活著，他會是一名偉人嗎？
學生：當然。因為到目前為止，還沒有人活到400多歲。

Mr. Smith: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.
Waiter: Yes, sir, I know---it's the heat that kills it.
史密斯先生：服務員，我的湯里有一隻死蒼蠅．
服務員：是的，先生，我知道了，它是被燙死的．

Son: Dad, give me a dime.
Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?
Son: I guess you're right, Dad, Give me a dollar, will you?
兒子：爸爸，給我一角錢。
父親：兒子，你不認為你已經長大了，不該再老是一角一角地要錢了(該自立了)，不是嗎？
兒子：爸爸，我想你是對的，那給我一塊錢行嗎？

A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they』re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight-year-oldkid came back home and asked his father, 「Father, is it expensive to be married?」 And the father said, 「Yes, son, it is very expensive.」 So the son asked, 「How much does it cost?」 And the father said, 「I don』t know, son. I』m still paying.」
有個小孩愛上了另一個小孩，對方是學校的同學。八歲或十歲左右的孩子有時會迷戀班上某個人，然後就以為自己戀愛了。因此這個八歲的小孩回家問他爸爸：「爸爸，結婚很花錢嗎？」爸爸說：「是啊，兒子，非常花錢。」兒子又問：「要花多少錢呢？」爸爸說：「我不知道，兒子，我到現在還一直在付錢啊！」

"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?" "No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
「孩子，你為什麼用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了嗎？」
「沒有，老師。可是你昨天說你告訴我的知識都是一個耳朵里進，一個耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在裡面。」

「I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .」
「Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!」
「Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .」
「對不起，夫人，為您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。」
「20美元！為什麼？不是說好只要4美元。」
「是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四個病人嚇跑了。」

TWO： Teacher：We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract. Now，can anyone give me a good example?
John：Well ，in the summer the days are long，and in the winter the days are short.
老師：我們都知道熱脹冷縮的道理。現在，誰給我舉個例子？
約翰：嗯，在夏天天都長，在冬天天都短。

The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
教進化論的老師已經滔滔不絕地講了快兩個小時，他的話題又來了：「讓我向進化論者提個問題——如果我們曾經像狒狒那樣長著尾巴，那麼現在尾巴到哪裡去了？」
「我來試試看，」一位老太太說。
「該是我們在這里坐這么久把它們磨掉了吧。」

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, "I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the st. He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, "I cannot go to the rich man's house today, for I cannot get over the river." He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the st and eat them. Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.
【譯文】 一個人正朝著一個富人的房子走去，當他沿著路走時，在路的一邊他發現一箱好蘋果，他說：「我不打算吃那些蘋果，因為富人會給我更多的食物，他會給我很好吃的東西。」然後他拿起蘋果，一把扔到土裡去。 他繼續走，來到河邊，河漲水了，因此，他到不了河對岸，他等了一會兒，然後他說：「今天我去不了富人家了，因為我不能渡過河。」 他開始回家，那天他沒有吃東西。他就開始去找吃的，他找到蘋果，很高興地把它們從塵土中翻出來吃了。 不要把好東西扔掉，換個時候你會覺得它們大有用處。

A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
「昨天給你的錢干什麼了？」
「我給了一個可憐的老太婆，」他回答說。 「你真是個好孩子，」媽媽驕傲地說。「再給你兩分錢。可你為什麼對那位老太太那麼感興趣呢？」
「她是個賣糖果的。」

Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

醉酒
一天，父親與小兒子一塊兒回家。這個孩子正處於那種對什麼事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：「爸爸，『醉』字是什麼意思？」 「唔，孩子，」父親回答說，「你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那麼我就算醉了。」 「可是，爸爸， 」孩子說，「那兒只有一個警察呀！」

Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills. Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"

安眠葯
鮑勃晚上失眠。他去看醫生，醫生給他開了一些強力安眠葯。
星期天晚上鮑勃吃了葯，睡得很好，在鬧鍾響之前就醒了過來。他到了辦公室，遛達進去，對老闆說：「我今天早上起床一點麻煩都沒有。」
「好啊!」老闆吼道，「那你星期一和星期二到哪兒去了？」